A guilty conscience ~ justwriteit

I. Then

First time I saw you,
I knew
You were my doom.

The dainty fingers,doe like eyes
The red hair and the 
grey hued eyes

The girl of the
dreams
I saw in my teen,
You were who she was
Now right in front
Well within my reach.

You invaded my life
My quaint little world
My safe haven.

No! don’t mistake it as love
For in your love
I never have been.

She is at home
My life,my anchor
My friend and my lover
She is who I want
Probably always have been.

I know it’s not a sin
To appreciate beauty
Complement someone so pretty and dainty.
But I feel guilty
For enamored I am with you now
To see you in flesh and blood
The girl of my adolescent dreams.

What do I do?
Plead guilty
And break her heart
Or ignore you
And preserve her love.
You,who seem 
More like a figment of my past
I see you but could never hold you
Are you real
Or should I confirm 
With a touch?

I wish you go away,
If you don’t,
Please make me forget.
I refuse to let my past
Ruin my present, my future
And betray her trust.

II. Now

Moments turned minutes,
Minutes promoted to days,
Still he couldn’t muster
Enough guts,
Courage.

No longer did she hold his attention,
No longer did she harness his lofty realms,
Only he couldn’t let go:
Guilt ridden he was,
Courtesy-
his old betrayer dreams.

The gray eyes now act like a pin
Pricking him in his old age.
He has none to blame
Only his previous promiscuous self.

If only,his dreams had
Left him
Just to himself.

Unaware she was then,
when consumed he was
of the doe eyed beauty;
Jealous rage engulfed her now
Seeing his ever blue eyes misty.
But the truth has changed she knew not -That the tears welled were not of reminiscence,but in fury.

For that was all he felt now when he recollects the Red haired doe eyed dainty.

Irony.
@sbb

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